Still, I largely achieved the goal of not having to take those long walks, thus resulting in the time drop. I should be very happy.
But, because I felt so much more prepared and confident than I had felt before Baltimore or MCM, I was expecting more--a new PR, perhaps even a Boston Qualifier! And, by these perhaps unrealistic criteria, I was kind of vaguely disappointed with what I had accomplished. Did I fail in managing my own expectations? At work, I use that term, "managing expectations," quite a bit. In fact, I'm currently doing exactly that for a project of mine, a victim of its own success!
So, wanting to know if I could have done better, I re-ran the race over and over in my head, from beginning to end. Perhaps what I'd thought--and felt--was a realistic sustainable pace for the first three 10Ks was still too fast. Perhaps I skipped one too many water stops. Perhaps I let doubt mess a bit too much with my head. Perhaps, despite the training and conscious awareness, I still left too much behind on the course. I also second-guessed all the pre-race preparations. Perhaps I didn't get enough sleep the night before. Perhaps I didn't eat enough for breakfast. Perhaps those Sunday LSDs, which went up to 22 miles, were not long enough. Perhaps the LSD pace, about a minute slower than the marathon pace, was too slow. Perhaps this; perhaps that. As a result of all this post-race quarterbacking, there are changes to my training that I'm contemplating. But whether or not my race expectations were realistic, I'm still not sure.
What I am sure of are three unfamiliar sensations that occurred during the last mile of the race: wooden legs, numbing forearms and hands, and mind zoning out. The latter is hard to describe. There was an otherworldliness aspect to it, as if I was on the verge of stepping into ... what? Simply fascinating!
By now, two weeks later, I am pretty much over that initial perhaps unjustified disappointment. I am focusing now on the fall MCM, with my next goal: to run my Boston Qualifier! :) I just joined the Run Your BQ training community, to guide me along. The first place guy in my age group in Rock 'n' Roll was faster than me by ~1 hr. 10 min! Disheartening, in a way; but, quite encouraging to know what is yet potentially possible--and, which would take me way past my BQ! :)
